My philosophy

So its been a pretty crap week in all fairness.

I dumped the boyfriend, and even though its me who finished it, it pretty much sucks, in fact I can't quite describe the emotion I'm feeling now.

The best example I can give to explain what I'm feeling is this passage as follows:

"It was a crippling thing, this sensation that a huge hole had been punched through my chest, excising my most vital organs and leaving ragged, unhealed gashes around the edges that continued to throb and bleed despite the passage of time. Rationally, I knew my lungs must still be intact, yet I gasped for air and my head spun like my efforts yielded me nothing. My heart must have been beating, too, but I couldn’t hear the sound of my pulse in my ears; my hands felt blue with cold. I curled inward, hugging my ribs to hold myself together. I scrambled for my numbness, my denial, but it evaded me.

And yet, I found I could survive. I was alert, I felt the pain—the aching loss that radiated out from my chest, sending wracking waves of hurt though my limbs and head—but it was manageable. I could live through it. It didn’t feel like the pain had weakened over time, rather that I’d grown strong enough to bear it" - S.M

So yeah, its dramatic, but it encompasses it in sorts. It's funny you almost convince yourself you're ok with it, and then... it kind of bites you in the ass. Then you tell yourself they're an asshole who is selfish and cruel and deserves the fugly bitch they're trying to go back off with... and then you realise... thats true, but you will still have a certain degree of hurt and a sense of loss over them. And then if anything... you feel angry more so with yourself than anything.

Ultimately though... you realise nothing will help cure your pain and loss more than a good quadruple drink of Jack Daniels, listening to some metallica, and watching the football then soon in time going out and meeting an uber sexy new man. This is the point when I realise... I have always been a very bright girl, and that this idea is perhaps the greatest idea yet.

Time may heal all wounds, but there is no greater solution to heartbreak than whiskey and metal. :) That's my philosophy... yeah, I know I got a new philosophy, 'man behind bar got great butt' well, I finally saw it. I now prefer whiskey.